Defining Ourselves

"But it's not who you are underneath, it's what you do that defines you."
- Rachel Dawes (Batman Begins 2005)

Is there a better modern quote that puts the American Dream in perspective? Work hard and provide what your family need, and you will matter. Provide more than what your family needs and you will become influencial. Become incredibly rich and you become untouchable. A legend of our own time. I know a lot of people who are living this out. In fact, I would be lying if I told you I didn't want to be rich.

Another way to look at it, is to say that literally what you do defines you. I don't think it is difficult to imagine this conversation:

[Two guys meet at a party of a common friend]
Guy 1: Hi, I don't think we've met yet. I'm Guy 1, I know Common Friend because I am his CPA. He comes to me for all his financial needs. Who are you?

Guy 2: I'm his gardener, I make his home look good enough to have these parties.

Guy 1:

No real information has been exchanged. Neither of them even thought of telling the other who they are. Instead they spoke of what they do. You have done that too. I have. I think the reason we default to our jobs when someone asks who we are, is because we have no clue who we really are.

I think it is sad that what we do defines us. God is so much more concerned about who we are instead of what we do. In fact, we struggle so much with finding God's Will because we are confused about this issue. I truly believe God cares very little about what you do for a living - yet that is what we really are asking for when we seek his will. He cares more that we are joyful, thankful and prayerful (1 Thess 5:16-18). In fact, his great commission (Matt 28:18-20) that explains what we are to do, is general. "While you are going, baptize those you meet in the name of the F, S, HS, teaching them everything i have commanded you (my paraphrase)." You can fulfill that by doing pretty much anything, because you will always be engaged with people.

Thats my rant for tonight...

"It is not what you do that defines you, but who you are that really matters."

Sr High...

I feel like I'm finding my groove in the Sr. High ministry now. I have a couple of kids who have volunteered to start the student leadership team. My hope is that these guys will use their influence with others to help students really own this ministry.

This past sunday, I hit the topic "How far is too far physically?" in relationships. I attempted to shift their perspective on this from "Is this ok?" to "Is this Wise" I left them with a few key points that i'll leave for you too.

So let’s get practical. How far is too far?

• It is too far when you use someone just to meet your needs or wants.

• It is too far when you run the danger of being overwhelmed by an avalanche of forces bigger than your strengths.

• It is too far when you cause the person you’re dating to compromise his or her personal convictions.

• And while we cannot draw lines in the sand for everyone in every situation, it is too far when what you do is not the wise thing to do.

There are a couple of other principles that may help as you make these decisions.

• First, retreating physically is difficult and sometimes impossible to do in a relationship.

• Also, the more serious a relationship is, the more the physical relationship can grow with it. In other words, an engagement should carry different physical standards than a relationship in its first week.

• Third, our natural tendency in the heat of the moment is to make decisions based on self-deception instead of honesty. In other words, Wise Choices are often made on the front end when we are not dating anyone.

• Lastly, all this should be done as we listen to what the Spirit of God is telling us.

What do you think?

Jr. High...

Some things are just hard. One of the hardest things for me right now is to feel like I'm doing anything right in the Jr High ministry. It cover grades 6-8, and while that seems reasonable, there is a huge difference of maturity between those grades. To make it more awkward, there are three main school districts I work with, and in one of them 6th grade is still considered elementary school. That means half the sixth graders haven't made the mental jump to being in middle school. I guess my frustration stems from the fact that if I aim messages and activities for the 6th graders, I miss those who are more mature. If I aim for the more mature, which is certainly a smaller number (maybe 4ish out of 15), I will go over the heads of the others. Any suggestions?

My hope is that I will be able to separate the 6th graders out and meet with them separately. Possibly on a Sunday Morning. We are probably a year from that point now, so it's probably time to start thinking about that transition.